How You Fit in the Whole

I get fired up when someone is helped by something I share with them. To add to their life; not taking something away from them. Of course, taking away ignorance, poverty, shame, and despair is always a good thing. I want to share with you some of my conversation that helped to change a friend’s perspective and increase their understanding in the connection of their success with others.

The big question came up in this way. I asked my friend “Jim”, (Jim is not his real name) “what are the things he was working on to improve his life? Jim told me he was trying to improve on something’s in his personal life that are his weaknesses. I asked him with what, was he, specifically dealing? Jim stated that he was never good at singing so he was going to take lessons. Now Jim is good at making people feel good, a whiz at figures, and a great father. Jim could do many things, but Jim was not an instrument of music according to his voice quality in the past. Truthfully he could not carry a note if he had 8 arms. Jim certainly was not convinced it was a worthwhile effort but he had to become what some would call “balanced”.

What I told Jim next knocked him for a loop. Initially that is. I told Jim don’t work on things that at best would just come up to average. When there are other things you do so well naturally, with a skill level that could not be achieved by working on a weakness. Jim was shocked because he was told by other professionals that you must be well balanced in many things to be a success. While it is certainly feels good and would tend to make one popular; it is just not true.

We are made to be different from one another for many reasons. Reasons like mutual appreciation, achievement, work and cooperation. Where ones weakness ends another’s strength begins. We were not made to become the person that can do it all. People who do a few things well tend to have connections or friendships with others who do things well.

So much time is spent trying to improve on what we believe we should be better at. Many times we are not making these improvements for ourselves but for what we perceive others think about us. Our attempts are often to please others; parents, peers, and coworkers among others. These relationships have more of an impact on what we focus on to improve. Many times this internal wish to please and be accepted drives us to improve what we are criticized for or embarrassed about. We attempt to avoid pain and the memory of the pain of not being good enough. This is of course not the only reason we focus on improving weaknesses as opposed to just improving on strengths. Yet this pain plays a significant part on where we spend our time in making ourselves better.

The educational system promotes being superior in all your classes. The thought is to create a high grade point average. Again the word average is stated. Average is a testimony to how we attempt to balance weaknesses with strengths. This places an insane motivation to become what we are not, as opposed to, who we are meant to be. It is time to free you from attempting to live in a life that is not yours, wear clothes you don’t fit, and pretend to enjoy things you don’t.

Picture a puzzle. It is made up of pieces. You see a middle piece has rounded parts on each side. This piece is made to be surrounded and fit in with other pieces. A border or outside piece always has at least one flat side and if supporting a corner will have two flat sides, which do not fit into any other pieces of the puzzle. A middle piece just does not fit right at the corner and a corner piece does not fit well in the middle. We are like pieces of the puzzle and when we try to work on our weaknesses it is like a middle piece trying to be the corner. The purpose is to be a part that makes up the whole picture. Using your strengths compliments others weaknesses and when they are strong this secures your weaknesses. We are never meant to be the picture by ourselves. Working in cooperation with others combines our strengths. This is when we are most productive, happy, and full of life. This is the best way to truly fit into the whole!

I would like to give you a challenge; for one month practice daily, something you are good at and ignore your weakness. Do not explain what you are doing to anyone else. Keep it a secret. Of course, don’t do anything to endanger your health or life.
Write me back at the 10 day mark, 20 day mark and 30 day mark. Let me know what you thought, how you feel, and what others are saying about you. Share this post with a friend.
God bless and I look forward to hearing from you!

 Hi! My name is Vonzel Sawyer. I am a husband, father, and grandfather. I started blogging to share from my experience, knowledge, wisdom, instruction, and understanding to help persons maxamize and magnify the positive in their life. That is why I used the terms "maximum" and "magnification" and combined them into a single word "maxafication". Just like something can be magnetized or winterized. I want to impact people to live largely and fully each day!